“I search but never find, hurt but never cry
I work and forever try, but I’m cursed so never mind
And it’s worse but better times seem further and beyond
The top gets higher, the more that I climb
The spot gets smaller and I get bigger” – Lil Wayne
A year ago I was starting to feel pain in my foot. It was my fifth and final year of college; I couldn’t believe this was happening again. It was my fifth foot injury in 3 years – and I’m not talking about little dings, they were the kind of injuries that put me in a boot and disabled me to even cross train.
“I used to be the kid that no one cared about
Thats why you have to keep screaming til they hear you out.” – Tinie Tempah
Each time after I got hurt I felt alone. Alone to deal with my own disappointment and pain. Coaches stopped asking how I was and teammates hardly talked to me. I felt completely out of touch with my team… every time.
“I thought I told y’all that we won’t stop
we back cruising through Harlem, Viso blocks
it’s what made me, saved me, drove me crazy
drove me away than embraced me
forgave me for all of my shortcomings
welcome to my homecoming
yeah it’s been a long time coming
lot of fights, lot of scars, lot of bottles
lot of cars, lot of ups, lot of downs
made it back, lost my dog (I miss you BIG)
and here I stand, a better man!
Thank you Lord.” – Diddy
But each time I got hurt I came back stronger. This past time was by far the hardest – there was nothing to come back for except myself. I spent the summer working two jobs, and actually enjoying it. At summers end I had to make a decision though – continue living at home and have a full-time job or move back to Tempe and give this running thing a shot. It should have never been a hard decision – my heart has always been with running.
“Shout out to my haters, sorry that you couldn’t phase me
ain’t being cocky we just vindicated, best believe that when were done
This moment will be syndicated, I don’t know, this night just reminds me of
everything that they deprived me of, kuhh!!!” – Nicki Minaj
While I was at Wake Forest a lot of people talked – people had varying opinions on my talent and dedication level. “You have an altitude tent, thats why you’re running well.” “She wasn’t worth a scholarship.” “You’re an alcoholic – look at those X’s on your wrists from the bar!” Oh hey haters, guess what – I haven’t used my altitude tent since December, maybe you’re program has issues – not everyone in it, and those X’s mean I’m not drinking.
“No I’m not lucky I’m blessed.”- Nicki Minaj
The past few months have been amazing. Seriously, it feels like I’ve been living a dream. I knew I would love this job (told ya Mom)!
“In this very moment I’m king,
In this very moment I slay, Goliath with a sling.” – Nicki Minaj
Now that I am in a good place I feel like I can do anything. I spent this past season setting up the foundations for track season and still ran faster than my goal for July. Now it’s time for some new goals because now I have an entirely new sense of confidence. I am positive that with a little more base and consistency the improvements will continue.
“Everyones a kid that no-one cares about
You just have to keep screaming until they hear you out.” – Tinie Tempah
At one point or another we’ve all been put down. In the end, if it’s something you really want, you have to fight for it because no one is going to do it for you.
“Back where I belong, yeah I never felt so strong
I feel like there’s nothing that I can’t try
and if you with me put your hands high.” – Diddy